This Saturday, I’m going to talk about my best friend other than my Joshwa. Her name is Rebecca, but to me, she’s Bubba. Bubba and I first met in the fall of 2003 in one of our Music Theory classes at Pearl River Community College where we were both voice majors. Now, I tend to get feelings about people when I first meet them and upon walking into that first class my attention was immediately drawn to a very negative person who immediately put me on edge. And as hard as it is to believe, I was once a very brash and abrasive personality – not too brash, apparently since I never lacked for friends. But Bubba was sitting next to this girl and saw only that I was being brash towards this girl, so she was protective and became friends. Of course, it didn’t take long for the other girl’s colors to show and while we were in London, she turned into a total bitch. And I see Bubba sitting outside our hotel, upset – which of course, tugged on my heartstrings. We talked, and so started my longest, closest friendship.
Now, like my darling husband, Bubba met me after I had already been on my path. So after our first year of misunderstanding, we dove headfirst into a friendship where we shared everything about our lives, and this includes my faith. Of course, Bubba is the one who gave me my first – and only, lol – tarot deck, a hand-me-down deck that has since returned to her care since they and I never were able to connect. So not to worry, I didn’t corrupt her and bring her to the heathen side. ^__^
But over the last 8 years I have had the blessing to help Bubba come to a deeper and better understanding of her beliefs. From introducing her to the idea of the Goddess (well, letting her know that it was okay to accept the Goddess), to helping her find the God, and several side journeys along the way. I am not the reason she’s a Pagan, I am merely the one who gets to help her down the path that was set for her. And it really has been a blessings for me, strengthening my own faith as I watch her bloom in hers.
But about a month ago, Bubba called me upset. You see, she knows the God and the Goddess, but she doesn’t know Their names. For some this is no big deal, but Bubba has felt a call to know Their names – a need that I can understand, since I know the names of the faces of the God and Goddess for me. Now, to those who’ve never had to seek, this may seem unfathomable. But if you’ve ever tried to talk to God(dess) and had that actual relationship, then you have an idea in your mind of whom you’re speaking to. If you’re lucky enough to be part of a major religious tradition, it doesn’t usually take much to know who your Deity is. But if you are of a minority belief system, especially if you’re first generation – like most modern Pagans – you have to find your Deity by sorting through what is known. And this search has been a long one for Bubba, and it only got harder for her when I left since I was the base of her support system.
But we have overcome the distance the way only true friendship can and earlier this week I got a call that made my day. You see, like many Pagans who have come from a Christian household that I’ve known – myself included – the Goddess came easier to Bubba, so connecting with the God – while important – has been more difficult. But this past week, Bubba had a breakthrough. She learned that her God is a death God, but He’s not a dark death Deity. He’s the light at the end of the tunnel, just as the Goddess is the beginnning and birth. He is a being of light and love, taking the pain and the sickness away, and hurting for taking a loved one from their families but knowing it’s what is best.
Now, I have a request for you, my readers. If you have some info about a young moon Goddess who is the beginning of life (Arinrohd has several of the characteristics of Bubba’s Goddess, but isn’t quite the right fit) and/or about a older death God who is a God of light and loving death – please pass it on to me so that I can share it with Bubba.
So for today, celebrate with us that Bubba has taken a step closer to knowing who They are, even as we continue searching.