Okay, so most of my Pagan friends actually celebrated yesterday, as the 21st is usually when the solstice falls, but this year it falls on the 22nd. So, tonight the sun will go down and our apartment will go dark (no, the woods aren’t close enough that I see a red-bearded giant walking out) and I will sit and reflect before lighting a candle and leaving it burning in our window. I’m looking forward to it, because I love honoring the passage of the year. It reminds me of the positive aspects of the future and let’s me let go of the negative aspects of the past. And I need stuff like that sometimes! I need the reminder that good things come around and that bad things pass away; sometimes, when I’m down, I seem to only be able to focus on good passing away and bad coming around. Both thoughts are true, but why focus on the bad?
This holiday seems specially made for just that thought. Though the full of winter still lies ahead of us (at least here where I live) the days will get longer and the sun will get stronger, and good days will come again. I do not fear that the sun will never return, as we’re told my physical and spiritual ancestors did, but I think the fear still lives, just in a different form. It’s the fear that the bad will pile up (and boy has the bad piled up, with the loss of my grandmother, my cousin, and my uncle) and overwhelm us, that peace and good will not return. So this year I light a candle as much to celebrate the return of hope as to celebrate the return of the sun. Because where there is hope, the sun will shine again.
Now, let’s be less melancholy! What is today like? The perfect freaking day before Solstice night! It’s so overcast today that right now, at 12:30 in the afternoon, it looks like twilight. It’s so dark in my home that if I wasn’t sitting right next to an open window, I wouldn’t be able to read the letters on my keyboard! Perfect, since I live in a place where the shortest day isn’t but four hours shorter than the longest. It has that perfect gloomy feel that makes me feel oddly secure. But then, I’ve admitted I was odd before – I think autumn is supposed to be overcast and dreary. As I write this, it begins to rain, and it’s like “perfect!” ^__^
I’m going to go make Solstice cookies in just a bit. Okay, they’re just chocolate chip cookies (from scratch), but I figure that making them on the Solstice makes them special enough to be called Solstice cookies. Don’t agree? Too bad. ^__^ I’m really excited because Joshwa and I are going to hang out with a girl he works with tonight. I met her briefly last night, and I think she’s adorable. I’m really looking forward to it. I know that it has mostly been my own lack of desire to make friends that we’ll just leave behind that has left me mostly home bound; but it’s a relief to have someone to go hang out with, the chance to be around people other than my family. (though we all know that, no matter how disillusioned I become, I still adore my family) Did you know in the last six months I’ve spent more time with people around the age of 5 than I have with other adults! Yes, you read that right. And while Kamryn is only 22 (as per Joshwa), 22 is closer to our age than anyone other than one cousin that we’ve seen in a YEAR. So, yeah, I’m excited. I’ll have a little ritual at home tonight and offer cookies to my fairy friends, and then I’ll take some cookies to my new friends. Sounds like the perfect way to have a Solstice treat!
So, for now I must go – I want to let my cookies set up for an hour or two before I try to bake them with it now raining. Be blessed today and realize it. As the darkness gives way to the light, let go of the negative in your lives and embrace the positive. As always: